h3llsoldier

Se7en - Somebody Else (romanization + english subbed)

2012-02-01T05:04:00.000+08:00

nice song :)

my side of story

2012-02-01T04:15:00.001+08:00

i did try to wait. but tonite, ur priority is not me and my priority is between u and my job. u din even try to get thru to me within all ur means. wat u did and wat u watsapp me really made me felt very bad. when i called u and u watsapp back i alr felt not very good at tat point of time cos i tot of smth but i dismissed it cos i din wanna be jealous in every little thing tat u might have done unconciously and i din wanna sound out first cos i tot tat would jus add weight to ur burden but seems like im the one in the wrong and ya maybe im not so impt after all, jus exactly the way i felt. maybe becos im not good enuff for you, im not sensitive enuff, im not pampering u enuff. watever the reason....
many times i dun even noe wat u say is really true or just to make me happy.
afterall, someone who can be with you anytime and talk to you is better than someone whom u can onli see once a week and talk thru msg.

2011-12-27T22:22:00.000+08:00

so 1yr passed so quickly. 2weeks and 1yr ago, i jus enlisted to NS and the new start of the nxt phase of my life. here i am, wondering how much have i grown. how much have i been of an influence to ppl around me.
after many talks by ex and current high ranking officers, a lil light is shed to my career path which was filled with mist. im starting to see the bigger picture in this job i've undertaken. still bumping my way thru life, seraching for a higher purpose, for the "real" me. discovering life. understanding nature. trying to gain knowledge and wisdom everyday. nothing seems wrong right now, but nothing seems right either.
in our busy daily routines, we might have neglected some of our families and friends. i can onli seek for their understanding. im still learning, growing, changing. i have many uncertainties. insecureness. how i hope tat the wish i made for time to fly when i was young to be reversed. right now, everything seems to rush by.
i wanna be a small boyboy again, where ppl will be so forgiving towards, and pamper me and bombard me with love and care. nida cave in for a period.

12 12 11

2011-12-12T22:03:00.000+08:00

The first nite u said u wanna call me and actually did called. 428days for ur first call :3

2011-11-23T20:34:00.001+08:00

Sometimes, ppl nid to close their eyes to the things they want and open their eyes to the things they got. Life will be much happier!

DUTY HONOUR COUNTRY

2011-11-22T21:45:00.002+08:00

so my course is gonna end soon! having loads of mixed emotions. but im sticking to my plans n goals. and yes, many of you noe, i've chosen the path whr im gonna put my country above everything else. it'll be my life and my job to defend my loved ones. dun really love my job yet cos i haven been fully adapted to things around. but i'll love it once i settle down. many things are happening, changing, some for the better some worse. but im letting some slide and not gonna concern myself with it too much, im working for my short term goals now. recently babyy have been quite sweet and giving me more attention alr. think becos now dun work nite time le more energy and enuff rest :)
New phase of life is gonna start soon! i've lost but i've gained a lot too! life is definitely gonna go on for me, so i'll finish this downslope and starting climbing up again! i'll reach the submit jus to enjoy tis sunset. end of the day the view will be worth working hard for :D
Adios

2011-11-15T21:41:00.000+08:00

ihate ppl who dun reply msg. But tats for ppl who dun reply.
I hate myself when my friends dun reply msg cos it jus show i meant nth to them. i put in my effort. its time for a rest.

2011-11-14T21:53:00.000+08:00

Feel like going back to the old me. jus chiong game everyday and forget about everything else. dun wanna talk to people. lesser interaction = lesser friction
And no
nid to tink too much about those shitty stuffs.

2011-10-27T21:49:00.000+08:00

So, many thing happened and im happy tat we managed to pass all those obstacles. my hot temper has been ctrl becos of you. i changed. if nt 2 hot headed cfm cui. and the last time u were so rash. always do stupid things without thinking of consequences. hahas lucky to have a good fren tat mediates. i hope we can cont on and keep changing n improving for each other. :)
Stop doing rash things and dun always tink about bad things when angry baby. calm down n analyze the situation, communication is the most impt! stop keeping things to urself.i need to noe wat ur tinking n feeling!
I love you <3

2011-10-14T21:35:00.000+08:00

i dunno why u want to behave like this :(
dun say things you dun mean.
dun do things u dun wan to.
cos its not jus 1 person getting hurt.
u have magic babyy.
but depending on how you use it, u can hurt or heal.
my heart is in ur hands.

2011-10-13T22:26:00.000+08:00

idun even know if u care. I can be sad I can be emo I can be angry I can be anything but as long end of the day I just wan u to be happy. So u wan peace, granted. But u need to noe, in my view, u went against everything u said. Of cos I'll be pissed. I wun ctrl u for doing anyth u like at all. Since when did I stop u from doing things. But I guess I'm jus being unreasonably nuisance and watever. I wun care anymore. From now on do watever you like. I wun nag or comment anyth again. I dun nid u to report to me. I dun nid u to be healthy. Jus go and be happy.

we are one

2011-10-12T11:14:00.000+08:00

We work in harmony
With our fellow men
We are the people of this land
To do the best we can
We are the ones to defend our land

We are one
Marching on
We are the strong defenders of this country
Moving on, we believe that we can achieve
So let us serve our home SINGAPORE

We live in unity
Working hand in hand
Within this land that we defend
We have to leave the past
To strive for higher planes
We have to train to achieve our aim

We push ourselves ahead
To our destiny
To make this country strong and free
As we go marching on
We sing this melody
So let us strive on to victory

2011-10-12T04:09:00.000+08:00

its been so dam long since I stayed up and tink of so much stuffs till wet. fuck. why like tat. tml is definitely gonna be a fucking bad day for me.
Can't slp can't eat can't tink well. Why have to be like tat. This sucks. I mus care less? Or jus keep everything to myself sua? Waiting like a idiot. Nap. Nxt week outfield. Nth done yet. Cui max. Time is against me. So are you.

0 inbox

2011-10-12T02:46:00.001+08:00

hope that the first message i get will be from you.

2011-10-12T01:21:00.000+08:00

Power! wake up at this ghost timing n find fault with my own sleep. good lo! make everyone not happy for wat. now everybody angry and ownself slp. stupid piece of shit.u promise her let her do wat she wan de, now why go disturb. nxt time jus let her do watever she wans.
Ok fine.

2011-10-10T22:04:00.000+08:00

thanks to lee. all the photo i upload is gone. see sat if got time zai re-up if not ... too bad.. ahas
now in aftc. having internet acess on a lappy in camp is a fucking holy god dam good feeling! XD
but its lights out soon. nites ppl and my beloved bbg :3
xoxo

364days~

2011-10-10T13:10:00.000+08:00

ytd went out with the best thing in my life to celebrate our 1st anni in advance! ^^
its been 364days alr but it jus seemed like ytd tat we got tgt. memories so fresh>.<
heyy dumbdumbb! i love you! :D

♥ rollercoaster rides

2011-09-17T09:27:00.000+08:00

these few weeks have been hella busy for me.
next few weeks will be even more worse. test after exercises and excersises again after tests. trying to squeeze every min possible out to accompany every single fren who has the heart to really ask me out and jus enjoy each other's company. sry to all of you sweet peeps tho i have to say i have to give priority to my baobeii =) and thus can onli meet u all at weird timings.
last nite was fun! K-ing and cam whoring and jus sing scream shout in the room.
my working time is really screw up and it will be like this for the nxt few years. guess i'll become more and more hermit? hahas.
so many things to stress about. im just gonna throw it aside and enjoy my weekend before hell starts again.
nxt week is gonna be so bittersweet >.<

from tumblr

2011-08-31T15:01:00.004+08:00

“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave. A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life.”

2011-08-30T18:28:00.002+08:00

stupid dumbdumbbbbbb!! >.<
<3

2011-08-28T17:40:00.001+08:00

Wat am i? Who am i?

2011-08-28T14:00:00.000+08:00

I wanna learn to be independent! So i wun feel weak whenever im alone.
And a promise made to myself. That promise i will keep.

2011-08-21T14:43:00.000+08:00

night safari with love<3
too bad if onli we had a camera. hahas. not bad experience there
the fire show was super nice ^^
onli thing nid to watch out for is bats i tink they are like free flying. i kena some shit =(
spent almost 24hrs with my bbbg ^^
happy max. very very hard to get chances like this esp she working weekends.
singtel is super fucked up. dam it!
i <3 outings! please make more outings!! hahah
K session! blading session! badm/bball session! drinking session!
c'mon ppl. weekends are worth celebrating xD

2011-08-13T08:57:00.001+08:00

I love when you text me first. It reminds me that sometimes you really do think about me. #HeyThatsSoTrue

2011-07-30T16:53:00.000+08:00

sometimes it just irritates me to tink so much about things tat cant be controlled yet i cant control myself to stop tinking about it.

2011-07-30T02:17:00.002+08:00

你是我的心结cum开心果

2011-07-22T20:29:00.000+08:00

Had a great nite catching up with one star :)
Past 2 days of specialized phase 2 was shit.
I gotta feeling~
from tml onwards all the way till dec life will be dam shit and filled with confinements :((((
Needa step up the game so wun kena jialat jialat.
Thoughts of pushing blame to these n thats and wats the point of doing so? Cant blame history since it alr happened and thrs nth tat can be done now..
Suck it up and keep walking~
i'll become the man forced out of me.

2011-07-12T01:36:00.000+08:00

thanks to my baobeii for coming down to peii me even tho she so tired and got alot of hw to do. wasted time thr cant do her proj. feel so guilty =x
her proj due thurs. all the best to her! pray hards.
love youuuu <33
thanks for keeping to your word. sry i cant be of help to ur proj. all i can do nw is pray for you. do many many buddha claps for you ^^

2011-07-08T23:10:00.003+08:00

My creative juices aren't flowing :/

timing is a big factor

2011-07-02T12:24:00.001+08:00

next week i'll be starting my specialised phase 1
expect to be dam shag mentally and physically like x10 of bmt and ocs..
so many ppl i wanna catch up with! bu everybody is busy with smth like work or studies and its really hard to meet up on weekends now cos its either they gotta rush off or i got smth on.
i realise recently its like other than getting high on alcohol theres nth else tat seems fun to do? or im just too monotone
i guess priority shifts as we grow and things take up more and more of our time which is the most precious thing that cant be bought, reversed or manipulated.
ah jong's bday celeb starts so late tonite i cmi :(
sryyy ah jong. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
i'd love to go but i got things i have to settle first.
15chapters plus for coming monday's test.
time is really running dam fast on things we wanna slow down on :(
ytd clumsysaurus lost the itouch i bought for her birthday.. so anxious and upset when filing report at the vivo cust counter.
i totally din have any thoughts of blaming her or anything. she kept tearing and im so happy deep down cos tat showed she treasured it very much.
clumsysaurus! time to learn how to take care of things properly le huh! :)
so lucky that YY kept it. hhahas.
every few weeks its either u lost smth or u get lost. LOL
dam, i hate drinking... makes me LS and Sleepy whole day.
and ytd so ciao saw jorina jie at vivo after filing lost report. drove us to eat good food in her BMW ^^
awesome much. but i'm not aiming for BMW anymore, i wanna get a Lexus :)))
my goal is to get my 3A b4 CNY! =]

weather is a dam bitch since the start of year. and i guess it'll onli get worse with the global warming. thanks advancing technology and R&D and all the massive money generating plants, factories, agencies, and watever cos their wealth proposals is casuing our mother earth's health to die.
good luck humans. we wun all die in 2012 but the human race wun live after 2100. its my prediction. humans will die and other life forms will take over earth.
ciaos

2011-06-25T13:27:00.000+08:00

been so long since i really had tie to sit down and really do nth
so i went to sheylara's blog which i din get to see for like monthsssssss
always interesting to read her blog.
how i wish can have a job like her's
seems so zi you... jus got back from england, like a few mths trip?
envyyyyyyy max!
anw, pro-term starting soon. im so filled with agony.
am gonna miss my baobeii so muchhhhh~
cant get enuff of her x(
ytd sent me so many sweet msges. hahahas. got me so smittened like a kid.
Lost&Found. managed to find smth that clumsy shagosarus dropped in my room while tossing violently aslpt on my bed. tsktsk.
mus save money to buy a new sturdy bed soon XD
hahahas just jokinggggg. dun angry kayy :)
so, i've heard enuff of shits and i mus make myself love my job since im alr chosen this path.
ciaos.

♥ 两个人在一起久了

2011-06-22T15:44:00.002+08:00

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

會发现自己有時幼稚的像個兒童。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

才知道原來一個人可以如此的去想念另一個人。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

自己的不良愛好會因為對方的不喜歡而終止。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

會比以前更加奮鬥，把壓力當成動力。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

奇怪的變的很乖，會按時吃飯按時睡覺。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

父母管不下來的习惯，会因为她的一声哼，而改正。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

會深深的喜欢上以前那份厌恶督促，催促，教訓。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

脑子里会老記著去看看手機。

即使是個山寨貨。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

會常看一些生活小常識，星座相配，異性服裝。

♥两个人在一起久了，

偶爾就和发春狀態一樣說出我愛你。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

撒嬌多了，冷言少了，（嗯）字多了，（不）字少了。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

看見相擁，親吻的場景，會用好浪漫去形容。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

人會變的很細心很敏感，嘴笨也學會甜言蜜語了。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

會在任何時間任何地點，為了一個可愛的幻想站著傻笑

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

常在琢磨是因為寂寞才想你還是想你才寂寞。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

漫不經心打聽她小姐妹的情侶是否很出眾，很樂意的給自己增加壓力。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

即使搂在懷裡了，也會為了自己一個虛有的幻想而擔心失去，很不安心。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

平常遊戲的時間是在專心的關注著對方的簽名，日誌，一切有關係的訊息。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

會很想陪伴著她去做她想做的事，即使是自己從沒觸碰過的。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

通常只是偷瞄走過的異性，然後驚慌失措的說句還是你最漂亮。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

兄弟，朋友都會常對自己說一句話。（重色輕友的傢伙）

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

虛偽說你真是個大坏蛋，內心不知道有多憐惜這個大坏蛋。

♥ 两个人在一起久了，

是会上癮的。

never felt this way before

2011-06-20T23:08:00.000+08:00

you have become my everything. thats why im so uptight about you.
im trying my best to make this the best r/s for you and for me.
hope u rmb wat we talked about today and rmb wat i said.

2011-06-19T11:20:00.000+08:00

有时候不是要生你气我不想不喜欢也不要生你气
但你不知道当能把我气到时我更气我自己
我气自己为何不能更宽容为何不能让你去做你喜欢的事
只能气我自己把你爱的太深抓的太紧
我好想放手两人都能开心
有时候好累思念的心得不到安慰仿佛失恋的人；心肠破碎
当你和我擦肩而过时我的心沉下了谷底
好讨厌那感觉连看都懒得看的感觉
不知道该如何是好
好想继续醉下去醉得不省人事睡到世界末日

2011-06-08T22:16:00.001+08:00

HOHO!! tis week feels fast! wed nite alr. 1week 1day we are fucking off from this niao bu la shi de di fang le! :)
so ulu and inacessible!! hate it! hope training at AFTC will be "fun". kinda half expected everything from the worst of the worst alr. but this is my job! i'll slowly learn to like it :)
very soon, 1yr will pass and i'll be going to study soon, if nth goes wrong.
very soon, i'll graduate and continue with this career for awhile then i'll decide with my then brain, whether to jump or to stay.
but i dunno why i picture myself staying, tho i noe i hate this place alot. urghh =X
anyways, nxt thurs is social nite! i hope thr'll be lots of awesome pics to upload. my loyal readers, stay tuned!! :)

2011-06-01T21:24:00.000+08:00

if i wan to achieve my goals in the shortest time possible, i'm not left with much choices.
if i take a detour, things might take a much longer time but goals will still be achieved, at much later date.
years are passing faster than i noticed and i haven got time to really sit down and do nothing and jus relax/enjoy.
even enjoying my weekends seems to be abit rushing for time or tight schedule.
and from here on out i tink all the days until i dunno when, i'll be leading quite a hectic life.
im quite disappointed cos my goals are still quite vague. i cant write down in detail wat i wan and wat i mus do.
i onli get the sense of direction whr i shud head and i tooked the step. and now i can onli keep walking...
wats up the road ahead? whr does it lead? if the road splits ahead, left or right? so many unknowns and questions bubbling in my head. so long nv do thinking and planning now almost everyday think think think brain gonna overheat soon :(
and the theory is true! keep ur brains working dun be lazy guys! cos the more u use the better it becomes.
DUN STOP LEARNING! its always emphasized and i really saw the importance in it.
and tat is why i even took the first step. and hopefully down the road, i'll meet up fun people, learn and see alot lot more new stuffs and interesting things. and learn impt life lessons as young as possible so i can have stories to tell the nxt generation.
when im free, as in really doing nth, the nxt time im gonna write down things i wanna do before a certain age, and things i must do before i die. and then come up with a more definite life plan.
i was afraid to plan ahead, and i guess many youngsters are the same too becos they hate the feeling when their plan fails or have obstacles but DUDES human plans are not foolproof. be adaptive and change/edit plans accordingly. smth tat i learnt thru many talks.
today we had a 2crab to give us a whole day's worth of talk on leadership and values.
this is by far the first and onli speaker and fully grabbed my attention for the whole day and i din fall asleep for even a sec!! its amazing if u noe my character. LOL
he got this enthusiasm and energetic aura and his small funny jokes, these are the things from speaker that keeps me awake, which not alot of ppl have.
last 2 weeks to pro-term
good luck!

2011-06-01T17:05:00.000+08:00

SO FREAKING BUSY FOR THE PAST FEW WEEKS! AND THIS WEEK IS SO SUAY KENA GUARD DUTY ON JY 21ST.... BUT LUCKY THE GUY TELL ME IS ON SUN, SO SAT MAYBE STILL CAN GO HAVE FUN FOR A BIT..
MY POV CHANGED QUITE ALOT NOW AND IM FEEL GOOD FOR HAVING PLANS AND AMBITIONS NOW. BUT I HOPE I HAVE THE DRIVE TO KEEP ME MOVING FORWARD AND FINALLY ACHIEVING MY GOALS.
THINGS TO LOOK OUT FOR NXT NXT WEEK!! SOCIAL NITE!
AND IM LOOKING FORWARD TO COMING JANUARY HOPING I GET BLK LEAVE THEN CAN GO TAIWAN WITH GBC!! :)
BEST OF LUCK TO ME!! X)

lazy to type much~

2011-05-28T02:07:00.000+08:00

2011-05-16T21:54:00.000+08:00

bday chalet was a sucess i'd say :)
thanks for all who made it down even for jus awhile. appreciate the effort much =]
for those who stayed yet i din accompany them much, i give my deepest apologies as i have to entertain my senior guests too.
was busy the whole nite bouncing from grp to grp.
1 thing im proud of is im not drunk! :))
hehe keep siam onli.
so happy with the gifts! but oso abit lost. cos i received 2 watches and both look so nice! i kinda bu she de use it lo.
received 2 necky oso. very diff style, hope can wear it soon.
tshirts perfume and a bracelet. hope got time to do some proper photo to upload.
ciaos

2011-05-08T17:53:00.000+08:00

next week is my bday celebration!! ^^
hope it'll be dam fun tho it'll be like bombarded with ppl
keke
been so dam long since i officially celebrated my bday.
normally wud jus go out with frens or wat. at home i'd onli get a cake and sometimes gift from parents.
the temp is getting hotter and hotter day by day
nxt 3 days in OBS is gonna suck big time.
lucky i din stay infantry. going to brunei for exercise wud be hell lot worse than this.
im sooooo boredddd :(
as age goes up, things tat interest me seems to go down.
but some things that never fail to interest me remains:

good things bad things

2011-05-05T21:23:00.000+08:00

im booking out in bout 24hrs!
wats even better is i finally get to see my babbyy. been so so long since i catch a movie with her. wanted to watch so many shows but missed it. she mus be dam sad cos onli can wait till funshion uploads it then i can download it and watch.
today been a whole full day compacted with lectures. and oso some thoughts from instructors.
i got a sense of wats upcoming. things are goin to get tougher and worser. this period of time is definitely gonna change me greatly, and hopefully most part of it is for the better.
to become a better person overall, a better leader in the end.
i wonder hows my future like?
i've goals and visions, even made plans for it.
lacking a little strong will and motivation each day
nid tat hyper-ness i had when i was a kid =\
today i finished half my stock of sweets just to stay awake for lecture. dammit.

dearieeee, if ur reading this, i just wanna let you know i misss youuuuu!!
i wanna spend more time with u as much as u wan with me. but distance makes the heart fonder. so while im not able to be arnd you, miss me more so u'll treasure me more when im out on weekends xD
<3

2011-05-04T22:22:00.001+08:00

i've realised how differently my brain works now and how it used to be.
some ways its good, mostly, its kinda bad.
and i have to say its all due to bad habits and maybe some unlucky incidents plus the type of surrounding
tat shaped me this way.
however, now thrs still time for me to change to prove to myself and everyone tat its not too late to improve.
to work for the better.
tho sometimes i find it hard to motivate myself towards my goal, but at least now i have made plans. i have guidelines to follow. and hopefully thru the way, i can find some ppl and things to keep me moving.
:)

2011-04-30T17:10:00.003+08:00

im waiting for you to take action. yepp
well yea, i guess, its as usual.
sometimes i purposefully dun tell u certain things cos i hope u do them not becos i told u to, but its becos u want to.
else it'll be meaningless.

2011-04-30T10:15:00.001+08:00

A human heart is a shelf. There's only so much you can pile onto it before something falls off an edge & you are left to pick up the pieces.

2011-04-30T05:11:00.000+08:00

it always have to be a long and tiring week tat things like this happens.
and i keep telling myself not to be bothered about it cos i have things to focus on and objectives to achieve.
but i cant act like i cant be bothered cos it does. it bothers me alot and it affects me in everyway thus impairing my ability to focus and work well.
but i guess u dunno. or rather, slipped ur mind.
you have never slipped my mind. and tats y its too dam hard on me, cos its jus too dam heart wretching to miss some one so badly.
yet the feeling of being so insignificantly small is constantly reminded.
i bet u dunno this. i bet, u dunno alot of things.
i bet u dun even read my blog anymore.
i quoted this b4: Don't promise when ur happy, don't reply when ur angry, and don't decide when ur sad.
and i emphasized this b4, dun promise when ur happy. but broken promises of the same issue came twice.

Good guys are found in every corner of the earth, but unfortunately the earth has no corners.
yes, im not a good guy. i have temper too. i jus couldn't bring myself to flare up at you.
i have such a great weakness against you tat it made me seem like a useless piece of shit.
fact is im still so in love with you and cant stop missing you no matter how angry/heartbroken i am.
sound so weakling, so useless....
but yea..

I Love You
If you don't feel the same way, tell me; instead of leading me on, and playing with my feelings.

IF only you knew

2011-04-29T21:38:00.001+08:00

my heart. it hurts for every beat it pound.
it hurts becos i am angry at you yet i cant bring myself to flare up at you.
it hurts becos it seems like you are not bothered or like wat u once said, used to me not being by ur side.
it hurts becos it rmb all the little things u said tat pierced thru it mercilessly.
it hurts becos you said u'll tc of urself yet u told me things tat proved otherwise.
it hurts becos u dunno how worried i am yet i cant be by ur side.
it hurts becos i seem so insignificant.
it hurts becos it forgot how not to hurt.

2011-04-29T19:45:00.000+08:00

if u sensed my angst, good.
if u sensed it but din noe wat to say, i'd say ur thick skulled.
if u sensed it but din dare to say anything, i'd say ur stupid.
if u sensed it but din bother to say much, i'd say ur wicked.
i oso need care and concern, not jus you. i've been trying to give all i can. im really
running low. but i bet im not as impt to you as compared you to me.

2011-04-28T18:42:00.001+08:00

wo hao xin ku
going crazy soon. 9days more to get out for a breather.
haix. sometimes i really dunno wat u tink. maybe u dun care tat much. or im taking it too hard on myself.
nvm, i will pull thru this tough time by myself. it has always been like tat. shall try my best to be totally independent from now on.
TECKSOON LEON WILL DEPEND ON NO ONE!!
imma strong boy! man to be!! officer to be!!!
:)

2011-04-26T20:28:00.000+08:00

its done. i've started my temporary full time job as a regular. its abit sudden, even im abit shocked for my decision. but its all for the better. i will proceed to uni and after i finish my bond i will hopefully find a more relaxing job if possible. i might even stay on as a regular cos the prospect is looking really good. tats for the future me to say. for now, imma work really hard and not cock up my plans. hope i can achieve my goals this time. its my first time seriously planning long and hard for my own life, my future. but i cant accept failure when i have put in so much effort in planning, so this thing must pull thru for me.

2011-04-26T13:10:00.000+08:00

deviating from my initial plan a little bit. but hope the end result ends up the same.
everything will be decided later on. will update after everything is settled.
today babbyy sent me an encouraging message. very plain simple sentences but gave me quite alot of motivation for the day. :)))
ty babbyy. <333

Thinking Process

2011-04-25T16:42:00.000+08:00

have been thinking so much for the past few days. hard and long, about my future and possibilities.
something that i wun usually do. thanks for being forced/pushed to OCS, i see alot of motivated ppl. JC batch.
so much potential. then i realise i have potential too. i've jus been too slack off and been thinking of the wrong things/wrong way. starting anew with very little motivation, im pushing myself to work hard n strive for the better.
for a better tml for myself, for my family, for my loved one.
im making a very great decision and this could change the way im gonna be maybe 6-10 years down the road.
i hope by the time i look back i can proudly say i made the right decision and live a better life than wat would have been if i continue on to be wat i am now.
i've made some minor plans too, along the way of my long term goal. i wanna get a cheap 2nd hand car and of cos get my class3 license asap!
and save up for some other stuffs tat i have in mind but cant be rmb rite now.
everyday is chiong Physical Training and Theories. fucking shag to the body and mind. hope i can last thru and make all this shits worthwhile.
been a long time since i updated my blog but from now onwards i try to make a regular entry to the best of my ability, and if time allows.
love you all <333
ciaos.

2011-04-24T20:27:00.000+08:00

We are Officer Cadets of OCS
To inspire us onwards as officers to be
We now state with reverence and respect
The Officer's Creed

I am an officer of the Singapore Armed Forces.
My duty is to Lead, to Excel, and to Overcome.
I lead my men by example.
I answer for their training, morale and discipline.
I must excel in everything I do.
I serve with Pride, Honour and Intergrity.
I will overcome adversity with Courage, Fortitude and Determination.
I dedicate my LIFE to Singapore.

gone were the good O' days

2011-03-26T11:22:00.000+08:00

i miss my hair
i miss my freedom
my never-say-die cheery spirit
the days whr we jus slack at the playground after work and laughed at anything we talked
miss the days whr we do and talk about anything under the sun
hating the same person
cursing at the management
getting high after a few cans of beer
bitching about customers
sharing secrets
i miss the days when we were all so pure and innocent.

Toothache vs. Heartache

2011-03-20T09:22:00.000+08:00

the only difference between the two is that one is physical pain and can be tranquillised.
the latter will have to fade off by itself as time passes by.
both causes the same pain to a person.
indescribable pain
unable to eat well
unable to sleep well
lost of emotions

dedicated for nobody. cos it speaks my heart, but no one would ever care so much.

2011-03-19T22:18:00.002+08:00

2011-02-25T15:03:00.000+08:00

everyday has been so packed. so rush.
so many things tat happened. so many emotionally crushing times.
so many things changed. for good, for bad.
everytime i thought of sharing my life in tekong with frens here, but whenever i login to blogger, nothing significant comes to mind. cept all the usual rants tat ppl are sick of hearing about. so i rather keep my blog not updated with crappy long winded complains.
hope tat everything will be better after fieldcamp. then i shall share my story by the time im free to touch my com again. cos everyone goes thru the same field camp but comes out a different man. different feelings and experiences. hope mine will be a interesting one =)

2011-02-20T19:04:00.000+08:00

问世间谁人知我心
不在乎天荒地老
只在乎开心就好

my brain has degraded to its simplest level. =0

2011-02-12T15:57:00.000+08:00

2011-02-05T16:10:00.000+08:00

ytd went drinking with platoon mates. got fucking high. first time since so long. but it will be my last time for the time being. still dun really like drinking and the feeling of hanging over.
its time i start to pick things up little by little. feel so lost again.
i dun wanna walk on aimlessly. nid to do long deep thinking again.
life now ain't really great, but it ain't too bad yet.
brain not working very well ever since i enlist. sucks
have to do mental training if i wanna proceed to SCS and eventually lead men.
c'mon brain juices. start flowing alr.

突如其来的雨下得才美丽

2011-01-30T01:57:00.000+08:00

我没有心电感应
没有预知的能力
我只知道现在决定跟你再一起
爱如果经过算计
会失去它的意义
突如其来的雨下得才美丽

你的声音太清晰滴答滴藏在我心里
全宇宙你只能唱给我一个人听
藏好黑色的粉色的几百种情绪
面对你笑容是我唯一表情

我和你直觉成勇气幸福数不尽
1+1等于爱情
有些事简单到不行只要够专心
爱不是无解的难题
我和你直觉成勇气幸福数不尽
1+1等于爱情
有些事复杂到不行越想越生气
脑袋空空比较开心

除了你我谁都不理

BOUND TO YOU

2011-01-15T22:37:00.001+08:00

When The Cold Wind Blows

2011-01-09T13:26:00.000+08:00

In the early morning march
With the field pack on my back
With the aching in my heart
And my body's full of sweat
Im a long long way from home
And I MISS my lover so
In the early morning march
When the cold wind blow~

F'ked up Feeling

2011-01-09T13:03:00.002+08:00

KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS KNS

2011-01-09T12:34:00.002+08:00

i cant breathe normally
i cant think properly
because you have entered my heart and impacted my life.

2011-01-09T06:01:00.001+08:00

So so cold :(
If onli i can slp n not wake up in tis dark cold nite

2011-01-08T15:21:00.000+08:00

its so hard to prove myself wrong.

so much data easily accessible yet you dun seem to noe anything at all.

or maybe it din even bother you.

so many things against me.

taking so much damage.

every single thing is crushing down on me.

any healers out there can top me up?

plate repairs are expensive.

and im out of health potions

<\3

2011-01-07T22:57:00.001+08:00

Its the little things tat u say and do tat makes my day or break my heart.
I cant help but find things to doubt abt myself. I dunno if im wrong or im jus tinkin way too much.
Please dun blame me for doubting becos i just cant fail to find things tat make me
Tink so much.
No matter whr i am no matter wat i do, i just cant stop tinking abt u.
Im feeling lost. Miserable. Weak. Minor.

2011-01-02T14:35:00.001+08:00

下雨天了怎么办我好想你
不敢打给你我找不到原因
什么失眠的声音
变得好熟悉
沉默的场景做你的代替
陪我听雨滴

期待让人越来越沉迷
谁和我一样
等不到他的谁
爱上你我总在学会
寂寞的滋味
一个人撑伞一个人擦泪
一个人好累

怎样的雨怎样的夜
怎样的我能让你更想念
雨要多大
天要多黑才能够有你的体贴

2010-12-30T10:42:00.001+08:00

desserted

2010-12-29T23:45:00.001+08:00

dreams of a pirate

2010-12-29T16:02:00.000+08:00

and sail the seas freely
out of this complicated, degenerating world.

so many misses i need more kisses

2010-12-26T09:53:00.000+08:00

the 2 weeks isolation is almost unbearable.
and with so many planes flying past above my head every day makes things worse.
the one and only thing thats constantly on my mind is that i dun wanna be thr. i wanna be home, on land, and see the faces of all the ppl i love.
esp Ms. Lee Peng <3
that 15days was a super awesome, never had before, experience.
first time in my life, i had simultaneous de javu
out of the 15days, near 10days dun feel very new to me. its like i had "been thru" those shits before.
but having said that, i still cant take things easy. cos its a "its like it happened before" thing but it din really happened.
super unbelievable, even for myself.
but tat 15days was also the longest time on earth to get by. all the pain, fear, discomfort and distress feelings, all negativity swept in like a storm.
i had to continually "hypnotise" myself to finally struggle thru the dark times.
finally its over! =)
but the weekends was not as fufilling as i expected. however, i managed to meet up with almost all of the impt ppl in my life. cept for the few of them whose either too busy or overseas.
nxt weekend is another good long one. i want to start planning somethings but i dunno wat to do man. its like really lost touch with the world.
im super looking forward to the CNY rite now =)
crazy i noe. but its like the nxt big thing that can get us out of the "nobody wants to be there" island.
for now, just hugs and kisses can make me very delighted to be breathing.

you're amazing

2010-12-04T12:42:00.002+08:00

2010-12-03T15:56:00.000+08:00

wat do ppl normally do when they have nth to do?
cos life without games is really boring.
its raining soon =[
shall i slp?
totally bored die.

2010-12-03T15:27:00.000+08:00

im so happy my dear actually cooked scrambled egg n made sandwich for me ^^
its the nicest handmade sandwich i ever ate. better than mine XD
5days left. =\

多的是你不知道的事

2010-11-30T22:13:00.003+08:00

2010-11-30T19:50:00.002+08:00

theres nothing for me to do online anymore.
twitter is jus spams and spams
fb is not ineteresting as before.
instagram is my new thing now yo.
but i'd rather be hugging you
feels like its been years thru these two days.
when can u sleep beside me
and let me kiss u awake
while the sunrise rays hit your face thru my window pane
i can never get enuff of ur sillyness
and always nv fails to make me smile
i hate you!
i hate you for having total control over my moods.
and u'd rather misuse it unconciously

2010-11-30T17:10:00.000+08:00

i'd walk in the rain
just to see u on time
i'd cross the busy road without a doubt
cos i wun let u wait
so show me its true
all tat u've said
cos the love i wan babe
is not jus a tape

2010-11-28T10:44:00.000+08:00

had a really nice weekend this week.
last 2 weeks to enlistement. hope can enjoy even more till the 9th.
i love my baobei! =)

每天回家都會看到我老婆在裝死 (Halyosy翻唱)

2010-11-26T23:12:00.002+08:00

chanced upon this super cute song+vid
enjoyyyy ^^

im booked

2010-11-24T13:20:00.000+08:00

hahas babbyyy booked me on 8th Dec evening. wonder wat's she up to.
ytd she make me wait so long lorhhh. tsk
then finally chat with me b4 i slp. happy max!
looking forward to 8th!!!

阴阳

2010-11-23T20:01:00.000+08:00

jus as i saw light, shadows engulfed me quicker than i could react.
tho i noe it all along wats gonna happen. cos whr thrs light, thr will always be dark.
fine.
i am stronger than before, and i'll be even stronger this time.

2010-11-23T18:55:00.000+08:00

previous post has harsh but now i've cool down. however i will not delete cos its my true emotion and i will do nothing to hide it.
now i got another thing to worry n tink about.

how lame can this get.

2010-11-23T10:24:00.000+08:00

jus becos i ytd mc today nid to spam me calls n msg to chk jus to make sure i go to work.
chee bye la lim bei not kid alr i noe how to tink for myself can. not like some immature fuck no matter do wat mus win onli, mus go ur way onli.
fucking irritating sia. and yes you are so dam rite tat day. even if u die i WILL NOT shed a single tear for you.
i will dance on top of ur coffin and then pee on it.
cos u did too much to lose my respect and did nothing to earn it back. i tried to give chances i tried to look on the brighter side. but it's all delusion cos there was all along no light, the other side is as dark.
/spit

sigh

2010-11-21T22:55:00.002+08:00

why does the sad feeling increases everyday

2010-11-21T17:38:00.000+08:00

From the day u made me dun even feel like calling u mum, u have already utterly failed as a mother. Today, u made me determined to execute my plans of living on my own outside. This post serves no other purpose other than seeking help from my fellow frens or whoever reading... Please contact me at my hp 84288977 if u got a spare room for me to stay.
I will not be a hindrance since i'll be onli staying for 2 days over the weekend since im enlisting soon.
Im very grateful for any help provided. Thanks very much.

a world too corrupt

2010-11-21T01:59:00.000+08:00

wat the fuck is happening to this world
seriously.
slashing incidents happening around sg.
animal abuses around the world.
jus saw a vid on fb about a woman(i guess from china from the things she said. cant really hear clearly) killing a rabbit.
WTF she was smiling n laughing while doing it. and still act cute somemore.
KNNCCB
RETRIBUTION FALLS ON YOU BITCH!
I dun even wanna tink about anything anymore now.
gonna have a good slp now
and it would be best to not wake up.
i wanna open my eyes n see im in heaven.
i dun mind ending up in h3ll either.
its much better than this world now.
bye nites swtdream

2010-11-21T00:58:00.000+08:00

sudd thought of an old song went to search n listen dam nice. currently like to listen to this type of songs i dunno why.
another way to vent my stress? maybe
haix
random thoughts
feel lost
feel guilty
feel bad
feel idiotic
feel scared
feel broke
feel unworthy
feel contradicted
feel so wrongggggggg
=(

scared

2010-11-21T00:40:00.000+08:00

have no idea why as the day draws near, im getting more n more stressed n afraid tat i might lose you.
stupid pink letter why cannot come later =\

(阿嬤的話）

2010-11-18T22:56:00.000+08:00

在细汉的时阵阮阿嬷对我尚好
甲尚好的物伴拢会留乎我
伊嘛定定带我去幼稚园看人在七桃
看人在办公伙儿看人在觅相找
伊定定跟阮说叫阮着要好好仔读册
呒通大汉像恁老爸仔这么狼狈
在彼个时阵阮拢听拢呒
阿嬷你到底是在讲什么
大汉了后才知影阿嬷的话
我会甲永远永远放块心肝底

想可一步一步的过去

定定拢会乎人真难忘

时间一分一秒块过去

在阮的心内定定拢会想到伊

阿嬷你今嘛在叨位

阮在叫你你甘有听到

阮的认真甲阮的成功你甘有看到

阮在叫你你知影没

阿嬷你今嘛过的好么

甘有人块甲你照顾

希望后世人阮搁会冻来乎你疼

作你永远的孙仔

搁叫你一声"阿嬷"

阿嬷我好想念你
你听见了吗？

2010-11-16T11:58:00.000+08:00

i like north american indians. they got this alluring aura yet strong repellsion feeling. woo!
cool max squared
found this at twitter @capturedblog

2010-11-16T11:53:00.000+08:00

Relationships just needs two wonderful people,
one who can trust and one who can understand.
im not a very understanding person =\
but i have alot of trust in you! so you gotta understanding to me =)

i want

2010-11-15T13:32:00.000+08:00

i wanna have nice red hair!
i wan a tribal tattoo with meaning
i wan a frostwolf tattoo
i wanna try tongue piercing
i want to get my bike n car license
i wanna travel arnd with my dear
i wanna go japan!
i wanna go taiwan and visit thr clubs see many many meimei
i wanna hug youuu all day longggg!
i wanna kiss until you face rot
hahahaha jokingggg

outdated updates

2010-11-11T19:38:00.000+08:00

first day of my Iphone

first day of my iphone, last photo

at office

trying out apps =)

my first ever, swensen lunch!

ever seen an earthquake in singapore?

the above is an EARTHQUAKE!

Happy birthday to the 2 ladies.

the middle guy is my sup =)

dam good person (Y)

jam

jamming

zi lianning

my Sayangggg

the vocalist

Zak

the bassist

Bryan

the drummer

WeiJian

the Electric Guitarist

this is how iphone and apps make ppl lazier

im watching anime on my bed with

full control of my computer

ON MY BED

MBS

skypark

Hot Tomato

this place cos nice steak! ^^

sun, sands, and sea!

and a flower on my head

Emerald.

looks nice

taste nice

apps

im sure u can read basic english

2010-11-09T23:03:00.000+08:00

sometimes, inspiring quotes are just not quite enuff to get me thru the day Inspired.
tho i managed to find some good memories back today to feed myself with, i got my emotions a little stirred as well.
expecting some moodswings in the coming period. but i noe of a certain person who can tranquilize me easily.
shes just too busy.
skip this.
since i got too little good memories, this prove tat theres alot of capacity to cre8 alot of better memories for me to keep!
but firstly, tml ima make good memories for my babbyyy by giving her a surprise!
hope the surprise serves its intented purpose tho. ^^ v

2010-11-09T13:43:00.001+08:00

you've changed.
i felt it
but who's not changing?
i just hope we dun drift apart.
tho we seldom talk now
seldom slack and everything
u dun tell me ur problems anymore
but ur position wun change no matter wat.
i noe i, myself, have changed too.
but i still make u one of my priorities.
even tho i might be ur priorities anymore.
its okayyy.
this is a special frenship i swore to make it last.

To all A'level students!

2010-11-08T23:55:00.000+08:00

please dun overwork yourselves and watch ur health!
be optimistic and take short breaks to recover then can focus more and longer
dun over stress yourselves cos it dun help
keep calm and positive mind!
slp well rest well, ur brain nid to rest as much as u worked it.
wish u all good luck!
jiayou

Dedicated to Babbyyyy

2010-11-07T21:33:00.000+08:00

wish you all the best for ur A levels!
give u all my studies luck! plus do 10000000 buddha claps for you!
i'll be so so lonely without ur texts and calls. hope can meet up with you nxt week!
i'll be missing you
everyday
&
everynite

ILoveYou

Last day of long weekend

2010-11-07T05:10:00.000+08:00

Jus woke up, disappointed.
Cant fall back aslp, paranoided.
Wat a way to start a sunday. First time waking up b4 9am on a sunday
And a worst time to wake up on the last day of the long weekend without anyth to do

2010-11-04T17:25:00.002+08:00

im happy with my life!
jus unhappy with the stress and some things happening around me.
but still, i will make it thru. as long u hold my hand and walk with me
everything will be fine